In My Brain Today: SpouseMart

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By Leslie Lindsay

It’s been a crazy-busy couple of days and that is why I have been a bit of a blog slacker.  With out-of-town guests, an Apraxia Walk, a wedding anniversary, and a new dog….well, you can only imagine the business.  Throw in two kids and a traveling spouse, well…

So, my hubby and I were celebrating our anniversay a little early.  At the pet store.  So romantic, right?  After 10 years, I guess date night has a whole new meaning.  Having a new hound around the house defintitely calls for some new equipment.  So, here we were, kid-free and we went to PetSmart.  I began by telling the clerk that we needed to get some food for our new basset hound.  “No problem, right this way,” she chirped and lead us towards the back of the store.

“I, uh…would like to match this dog food,” and I procured a snack-sized Zip-Loc from my purse with kibble I had gotten from the Foster Family who had Sally before we adopted her.

The clerk cocked her head and said, “Humm…what kind do you think it is?”

“Pro-plan,” I said confidently and sort of proudly.

We wandered over the the dog food aisle and took a peek at the vast number of bags of dog food.  Lo and behold, there it was…picture on the front of the bag and all.  We had matched the dog food.  Hooray.  When I asked if Proplan was a reputable dog food, the clerk told me, very diplomatically that it was “the best Purina makes.”  And so, I nodded and looked to my husband.

“Well,” he began, “She’s fat.  And she toots a lot.”

“Yeah, and she has bad breath,” I added.

The clerk smiled.  “Well, here’s a little secret:  the store is organized so that the cheaper, less healthy food is in the back of the store and the best, grain-free, organic stuff is up front.”

I took one look at the Proplan price and already felt like that was plently.  Geesh…how much more is the better stuff gonna cost me?!  But the clerk assured me that the cost is really not a big deal.  The better food will help with Sally’s coat, her breath, her flatulence, and she won’t be as hungry all of the time.  Sold!

So, after waddling out of PetSmart that Monday evening, honkin’ organic dog food in tow,  a bling-y name tag lasered in-store, we were proud new parents of a basset hound. 

Later that night, our “pillow talk” included something along the lines of, “I wonder what would happen if we went into a store and said, you know….my spouse has some of the same issues my dog does:  s/he is fat, toots, and has bad breath [but she’s got a great personality]…is there anything you can do for that?!” 

And that is what is in my brain today, Thursday October 20th 2011.   

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