Marriage is all about being a team and making compromises. There’s a bit of attraction and common interests and shared goals, and if we’re lucky–romance : ) I say this after 7 years of marriage to a wonderful guy whom I still find “cute.” Oh, he would cringe if he knew I put that out in the cyber world.
So I want a new couch. Badly. Yesterday. Last year. Tuscan red. I’ve never had a red couch. But there is something so alluring about it. The richness, the warmth, the romance. I found what I consider a good deal–it’s not the most expensive and not the cheapest, either. It’s not the L.L. Bean sofa I saw in the recent catalog. It’s a knock-off. It’s adorable. But the final answer is “No.”
It’s hard to hear “no” in my thirties. I thought that was reserved for 3 year olds and teenagers. I guess that’s what I signed up for as a stay-at-home mom. I can’t have everything I want right when I want it. Since I’m lucky enough to stay home and raise the girls for the first part of their developing years I really shouldn’t complain. I can deal with a couch with a few kid-related stains. It’s the same couch I purchased as a single nurse that adorned my first real apartment. And in a way, getting rid of that couch is like an end of an era. Am I ready for that?
Here’s another compromise I made recently–waking up at the crack of dawn. At first I thought it was a way to connect with my husband before he left for work–without the girls. Okay, it’s only day #2 of doing so…so that may change. But instead the whole family seems to be awake at the same time–early. Now I just have a longer kid-filled day when I was really hoping for a quiet moment or two with Jim. Or myself, heaven forbid.
But it really has become quite nice. I actually have time to get down on the floor and play Legos with the girls. I can see the inner workings of their minds as they construct restaurants for their Lego kitty and cars for their shiny gemstones. I see their little fingers manipulate the tiny plastic bricks that build the castles of their imagination and the world of their dreams.
So while I want a new couch and a little early morning time for myself, I am finding that the compromises I have made don’t really harm me, but instead make me a better wife and mom.
And that is what is in my brain today, Thursday July 22.